Goats Milk Delux by Flamingo (Not Rated, but I'd say strong R)

Fandom: STARSKY AND HUTCH
b>Pairing:</b> Starsky/Hutch
Author on LJ: Unknown
Author Website: http://www.squidge.org/~flamingo/starskyhutchslash

Why this must be read: I was going to say because I said so, but realized that only works on my kids.

I'm new at this, so here I am, jumping in the deep end.

This hot little piece must be read because it's, well, hot!! And it's funny. Did I mention hot?

It's a classic seduction piece, using a classic method: Food. Who wouldn't want to be seduced with food?

But a hot dog? Weird, yes, but in the hands of a certain dark-haired detective, it may as well be edible underwear.

From the episode Savage Sunday, we learn that Hutch likes his hot dogs plain, and Starsky likes his with a bit of everything. So, in a brazen game of "taste my weinie", good ol' Starsk coaxes and seduces TwoCentsPlain!Hutch into a walk on the wild side. It's the least Hutch can do after making poor Starsky drink goat's milk and dessicated liver in the episode Pariah.

Of course, Hutch, never one to stand on the sidelines and let Starsky run the entire show, throws down his own gauntlet:

"My treat, partner," Hutch said. "Besides. For some reason . . . I've got this sudden urge for that famous nine-inch, warm, juicy, plump hotdog you keep telling me about."

That alone was worth the read, but there's more.

Seeing a chance for some good old fashioned debauchery, Starksy picks up the gauntlet with ease...

"Okay. That sounds fine, Hutch. But maybe I'd better warn you—not everyone can eat those special dogs. For some people—well, it can just be too much to handle."

Indeed. You go, Starsky.

So they tease and taunt each other, including a hilarious Starsky riff on virgin taste buds and strippers, which is one of the funniest paragraphs I've ever read.

I won't say anymore because it'll spoil it, but trust me... try it, you'll like it.

Read this because it's hot, because it's steamy, and in my honest opinion, the combination of hot guys, hot dogs, a hot night in a deserted parking lot makes for damned hot fun. Flamingo has a knack for writing about every day, ordinary things,like a stakeout or a innocuous hot dog, and making you forever laugh and blush whenever you think about them.

Enjoy it. I did.


goatsmilk